The Basic Military Rules

The Basic Military Rules:

Marine Corps Rules:

01. Be courteous to everyone, friendly to no one.

02. Decide to be aggressive enough, quickly enough.

03. Have a plan.

04. Have a back-up plan, because the first one probably won’t work.

05. Be polite. Be professional. But, have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

06. Do not attend a gunfight with a handgun whose caliber does not start with a ‘4.’

07. Anything worth shooting is worth shooting twice. Ammo is cheap. Life is expensive.

08. Move away from your attacker. Distance is your friend (Lateral & diagonal preferred.)

09. Use cover or concealment as much as possible.

10. Flank your adversary when possible. Protect yours.

11. Always cheat; always win. The only unfair fight is the one you lose.

12. In ten years nobody will remember the details of caliber, stance, or tactics. They will only remember who lived.

13. If you are not shooting, you should be communicating your intention to shoot.

Navy SEAL Rules:

1. Look very cool in sunglasses.

2. Kill every living thing within view.

3. Adjust Speedo.

4. Check hair in mirror.

US Army Rangers Rules:

1. Walk in 50 miles wearing 75 pound rucksack while starving.

2. Locate individuals requiring killing.

3. Request permission via radio from ‘Higher’ to perform killing.

4. Curse bitterly when mission is aborted.

5. Walk out 50 miles wearing a 75 pound rucksack while starving.

US Army Rules:

1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.

2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.

3. Curse bitterly.

4. Curse bitterly.

5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.

6. Call in air strike on suspected targets.

7. Curse bitterly.

US Air Force Rules:

01. Have a cocktail.

02. Adjust temperature on air-conditioner.

03. See what’s on HBO.

04. Ask ‘What is a gunfight?’

05. Request more funding from Congress with a ‘killer’ Power Point presentation.

06. Wine & dine ”key’ Congressmen, invite DOD & defense industry executives.

07. Receive funding, set up new command and assemble assets.

08. Declare the assets ‘strategic’ and never deploy them operationally.

09. Hurry to make 13:45 tee-time.

10. Make sure the base is as far as possible from the conflict but close enough to have tax exemption.

US Navy Rules:

1. Go to Sea.

2. Drink Coffee.

3. Deploy Marines

Go Navy!

19 thoughts on “The Basic Military Rules”

  1. Marine Corps Rule #14: Never stand when you can sit, never sit when you can lie down, and never lie down without going to sleep.

    1. #15. Never run when you can walk, never walk when you could ride, never stand in the sun if shade is available, never pass up potable water without drinking and filling canteens.

  2. And then there is always this:
    MILITARY DIFFERENCES

    The reason the U. S. Armed Forces have
    difficulty in coordinating and cooperating
    with each other is that they do not use the
    same jargon, and misunderstandings
    frequently occur. For example:

    If you tell the U. S. Navy to SECURE a
    building, they will simply turn out the
    lights and lock the door.

    If you tell the U. S. Army to SECURE a
    building, they will occupy the structure
    and permit only persons with a proper
    pass to enter.

    If you tell the U. S. Air Force to SECURE a
    building, they will take out a three year
    lease with an option to buy.

    If you tell the U. S. Marines to SECURE a
    building, they will call for an air strike,
    assault the structure with heavy artillery,
    ground and small arms fire, capture the
    facility, fortify it and hold the ground at
    all costs until properly relieved.

    1. At some point during my short time in “The Corps” I heard this,not really a rule. but “When you’re marching you ain’t fighting ” Nick 0311 67-68

  3. You left out a small sub branch: Devil Docs 1. Patch up the winning Marines after all E-club fights with Navy personal. Fill out toe tags for the two other branches. LOL 2. Follow all Marine rules 3. Lay down life to save a Marine.

  4. Sgt. Grit missed this part, because nobody ever sees it which means it was successful:

    US Army Spec Forces rules:

    1. Curse bitterly when receiving operational order.

    2. Make sure there is extra ammo and extra coffee.

    3. Curse bitterly.

    4. Curse bitterly while providing forward recon for Marines and Seals to come in safely.

    5. Do not listen to 2nd LTs; it can get you killed.

    6. Call in air strike on suspected targets.

    7. Curse bitterly when the media gave credit to Marines and Seals but happy you were undetected. Not even sure Marines and Seals knew you were even there. Hooah!

    1. Numbers 4 and 7 are BS. Vietnam 1966/1967 in Leatherneck Square and the only army around were some twin 40’s for perimeter guard…..RT

  5. In France for the air force (armée de l’air ) we say : little army, a lot of air…(un peu d’armée, beaucoup d’air.)
    French Troupes de Marine.

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